#they owe each other a personal growth

[ssaraexposs]

THE PROMISE THAT WILL CHANGE THE COURSE OF HISTORY

[navree]

once again on my frankenstein bullshit because i’m sure it’s a very nice bookend but it is baffling that so many fix it attempts for this story are built on frankenstein asking the creature’s forgiveness in the arctic because like??? no??? the only time victor was ever in the position of “hey you should really say sorry to this guy” is after he first ran away. everything else after that should be the creature fucking groveling and saying “hey sorry i murdered your brother and then framed your friend so she’d be executed and then murdered your boyfriend and the murdered your wife which made your dad weaken and die”  because in the scales of who’s been wronged more, guy whose father was mean to him is very much trumped by guy who had everyone he loves wiped the fuck out because his son threw a temper tantrum. 

sorry.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

A fun question your opinion: In each arc, what do you think is the theme of each arc? ( It can be a motif, messages, subject)

These are a mix of jokes and serious thoughts ^^ just to avoid the post from being too heavy overall!

The Rose-Red Tyrant:

Breaking free from perpetuating a cycle of abuse

You are your own person, not a puppet controlled by your parent/guardian

At the same time, you have to take accountability for your own actions (your background can explain your poor behavior toward others but it does not excuse that behavior)

Control that is too constrictive will only push away potential connections and experiences, keeping you isolated and complacent

Anger management classes are good for you, guys

The Usurper from the Wilds:

Let’s play fairly and be good sports!

Judging people for their merits rather than by titles or birth

What makes someone worthy to lead is noble behavior and attiude

Standing up for what’s morally right, even if everyone else seems to be against you

You have value, worth, and hope in spite of what others may tell you and put you down for

It’s totally okay to get revenge on the asshole that tripped you that one time/j

It’s technically not a crime if you don’t get caught (except Leona did, in fact, get caught)

The Merchant from the Depths:

Don’t be ashamed of your past self—embrace it, accept it, and use it as a point of reference for self growth

Be the bigger person rather than becoming a bully yourself

Let your accomplishments speak for themselves

There is no “easy way out” or shortcut; be prepared to face the consequences of your actions

Not everything is as it may seem (think about the “trick” with Azul’s contracts)

… Read the terms and conditions very carefully and think things over before you sign a contract 💀

Schemer of the Scalding Sands:

Wow, this baby can fit so much generational trauma!!

Sometimes you just miss each other’s messages or greatly misinterpret the other’s intentions (Kalim giving Jamil the benefit of the doubt, Jamil obviously being the Bad Guy and everyone else has to point that out to Kalim)

There’s a very complicated relationship between those in power and those without power; this can breed hatred for those at the top

Talent and skill left unacknowledged can fester into resentment

Institutions of higher education can and will accept monetary bribes, what are you gonna do about it?

Not everyone wants to reconcile and make friends; this is okay and should be more normalized

A Beautiful Tyrant:

You can try your best and work hard, but life doesn’t owe you anything (depressing thought, but unfortunately true)

Beauty is not limited to just one’s looks; beauty can also extend to one’s character and actions

Your worth shouldn’t come from external forces; if you are satisfied with yourself, you will always be “beautiful” no matter how you look or what losses you may experience

Public opinion and the entertainment industry are brutal af

Screw gender norms 😤

The Watchman of the Underworld:

The grieving process in general

Moving on from the past instead of fixating on it and letting the past consume your present and hold you back from a future

Learning to forgive yourself

Reaching out and making new support systems/opening up to others to help you cope

Bearing the sins of your ancestors (Shroud family curse)

The Lord of Malevolence:

Change is inevitable, all good things must come to an end; we must learn to accept them and bravely move toward the future

Love endures, transcending race (Sebek), blood (Silver), and time (Lilia)

Self-sacrificial love (Maleanor for Malleus, Lilia for the other Diasomnia boys, Dawn Knight for his own family, etc.)

Is it “true” happiness if it is a fake reality, a convenient dream?

We hate and fear what we do not understand, even though we have the capacity to

You cannot live forever in a happy fantasy world where none of your loved ones/favorite characters leave you, your trauma doesn’t exist, and everything conveniently pans out how you want it to; sooner or later, you must “wake up” and face reality (this point is particularly meta; it applies both in-game and in the real world, speaking to us players and our relationship with the escapist fictional content we consume)

Prologue: Welcome to the Villains’ World and Overall Main Story:

The power of friendship :))

Revisionist history (cuz… y’know… Great Seven and all)

We’re stronger together than alone

It’s okay to rely on others

We may be very different people from very different backgrounds, but it is still possible for us to understand one another

[king-craftsman]

The SwapCraft Challenge

“Dude, have you heard of this Swap Craft challenge?”

In came Josh, sweaty and tired, probably just from the late shift again Bradley could imagine. They’ve been roommates for six months and if it wasn’t for the fact that the two had a great interest in Swap Craft, Bradley could barely even imagine that they’d get along at all, it was the only thing they talked about! Bradley got up from the couch.

“No, what is it?” He asked.

“It’s like this challenge where we link our accounts on SwapCraft and then get to change something physical and something mental about each other in turns. Whoever quits first loses,” explained Josh as he continued in, excitedly showing Bradley his own phone where he could see the big bold letters themselves, “Swap Craft Challenge” written in white. A prompt asked if he was willing to ‘Enter’.

“Really?” questioned Bradley, this seemed way too good to be true.

“Yeah, like you can do all sorts of stuff, but there’s no winner. Dude, we should try it!” suggested Josh, Bradley shrugged. Fuck it, there wasn’t any other way he was going to spend the night. After only a few short moments the both of them found themselves in a two-person “lobby” for Swap Craft, with Josh just itching to push play. “Okay but one rule, no mental changes or stuff, okay? I don’t want you fucking around with my head.”

“Man, I’m not dumb enough to do something like that. Plus I bet you I can win without even needing to,” claimed Brad.

“Oh yeah? You’re on,” replied Josh as he pushed play and suddenly saw that it was his turn as he began to focus on his cracked phone. “Now what to do…what to do…” He suddenly looked Bradley over, he hated to admit it but the dude had gained some weight and packed on some pounds these last few months. It wasn’t like it was bad or anything, but it would be fun to see his funny twig of a roommate again that he saw when he first moved in - and that’s exactly what he was going to do. “Ha! Have fun!”

“Wha-” Brad stopped as he glanced down to suddenly see some of the bulges from his stomach pressing into his shirt suddenly rescinded. He hated he had gained weight and wanted to even go to the gym to lose it naturally, but it was no bother, his stomach sank and became flat like it had been only a few months ago. He laughed. “Nice! Okay my turn then.”

Bradley paused, this was a lot harder, he only really had one picture of Josh and he had taken that weeks ago when his phone had broken for the third or fourth time. But what Brad could go for was to see Josh grow taller, the guy was practically a midget being a small 5’9 when Brad himself was at least 6’3, some height was what he needed and if Josh was going to help him grow skinny then Bradley could help Josh grow taller.

Suddenly Josh saw the smirk appear over Brad’s visage and stopped when he felt his own legs churn as they began to spread out, whatever fat he had was pulled against him as he suddenly realised his own torso was also stretching out. He almost felt like he was being pulled from both sides, but not in a painful way as the small 5’8 man became a suddenly gargantuan 6’5 and a hell of a lot thinner because of it. Bradley was in hysterics.

“Oh come on, that’s not funny!” snapped Josh.

“Yeah right, hey if you don’t like it, you should quit,” teased Bradley. Josh rolled his eyes.

“Not fucking likely,” he muttered under his breath as he was just glad it was his turn now, feeling so stupid with his clothes obviously being far too short for him and glad nothing else grew. Though speaking of growth…Brad did say they couldn’t do any mental changes, but transformations never last forever and if he was going to stay skinny, why not give him a bit of a boost? Josh did some tinkering of his own as he looked up, sneering at Bradley.”Hey Brad, do you have that ten dollars you owe me?”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s right here,” grunted Bradley as he began reaching towards his wallet, pulling out ten dollars which he threw to Josh and Josh could see it clear as day, a gym membership card, tucked away behind his debit card. It worked and now for the best part.

Bradley shifted as he scratched at his own chest, starting to feel a tingling spread across them as he looked down to see his chest beginning to grow, divulging into pecs that pressed against his shirt, only making it tighter as his whole torso clearly began to bulk up. His entire chest was that of a well trained bodybuilder, completely separate from the rest of his skinny body.

“What the fuck?”

“Oh well I made you skinny, only fair I make you fitter too,” chuckled Josh as he got his ten dollars, scraping it up from the floor. He ignored Bradley’s glare. “Your turn.”

“Okay fine if that’s how you want to be,” Bradley smiled as he scratched at his pecs before an idea came into mind. His smile grew wider as he went on to Josh’s profile page and began typing away. “How are you doing Joe?”

“Joe? What the-” Josh’s eyes became a stark brown in complete contrast to his once blue eyes as he blinked. “I’m doing good, it’d be better if you just quit now then.” He chuckled, yeah Joe, he didn’t know why he was confused by that, it was his name after all, Joe.

“Your turn.”

Joe wanted to have more fun, he quickly began to observe Bradley’s profile and meddled away.

“So how was work today?” asked Joe. Bradley rolled his eyes. Work was boring and he didn’t know why Josh or “Joe” was starting to ask about it now, working in a grocery sto- He blinked. He meant the gym wasn’t all that great.

“It was fine, a couple of new guys joined the gym and I showed them around,” answered Brad as his own shirt was almost becoming a literal tank top with the way that the sleeves were starting to tear from his own bludgeoning biceps that were once skinny arms but had now grown into great muscular appendages for a great beast of a bodybuilder like himself. “Aw fuck this, I’m not letting you ruin my clothes too.” Brad quickly took off his shirt, revealing his sexy abs.

“Well, it’s your turn now, Brad,” chuckled Joe. Bradley was impressed, “Joe”, still didn’t know what hit him or what was about to as work was on his mind - and why not have “Joe” fit his name correctly, instead of working at the movie theatre, he could work somewhere else.

“How was the club tonight, Joe?”

Joe got a flashback of himself suddenly ripping off his own shirt like Brad here as he remembered all the money and guys that were fawning at him over at the strip club he started working at only two months ago. Fuck, it felt good to be able to do that and show off his body. But for now he simply shrugged, didn’t want Brad to distract him, even when he suddenly started to see that his own skin was starting to grow tanned from his head to his toes.

“Okay, well I think you’re- Wait…” Joe blinked. “Why are you asking me about work?” Brad shrugged.

“You asked me,” he replied.

“Yeah but I only asked you because-” Joe suddenly blinked again as he paused and glared at Bradley. “Are you cheating?” Bradley furrowed his brows.

“No!” He said.

“I can tell when you’re lying,” growled Joe. “You know what, I fucking knew it, that’s it.”

“What are you doing?” exclaimed Bradley as he saw Joe rapidly typing and swore his heart had never beat faster at that moment (except after a tough workout).

“Winning this thing,” declared Joe as he pushed down on his phone and Bradley watched as his own feet pushed through his socks, the toes colliding with the fabric all at once before bursting a hole through them all and ruining the socks that became tattered and now barely able to adorn his large and musky feet.

But that didn’t worry Brad enough as much as the idea that any mental changes would come about - but he felt nothing for a time, and then he suddenly felt everything at once as his eyes slammed shut and sparks almost appeared when his own cock was suddenly so large that it was able to poke through his underwear.

“Woah, what the hell?” cried Brad as his hand automatically grabbed at his dick, trying to stop the flow of pre-cum that stained his legs. “Oh my god, what the hell are you doing? Don’t you have to give your intelligence to raise someone’s libido?”

Joe nodded.

“Yep, but it’s worth it, way smarter than you anyway,” grunted Joe as Brad narrowed his eyes. Two could play at this game. “Your turn.”

“My turn…Alright I’ll show you what I’ll do on my turn…” Brad muttered as he bitterly typed away, wondering what to alter, what to change when he smirked. Not only in the next few moments did Joe begin to implode with muscularity (seemingly Josh either missed the fact that you could just alter the muscle mass in the whole body for a little bit more of your intellect if you wanted to).

But suddenly Joe’s own cock was throbbing member as all his clothing was completely gone, ripped away by both his bulge and his great muscularity as he was starting to look more like the real deal himself with every passing turn. “Have fun. Your turn.”

Joe was feeling a different kind of way, he was sure that just a bit more couldn’t hurt as he laid there in the tatters of his own clothes, resisting the urge to bounce his pecs or dance to the music that had filled the room this entire time and the beat which only grew louder in Joe’s mind as he recalled the strip club.

“Fucking…Alright I’ll do this…” muttered Joe as he enjoyed the feeling of watching Brad realise his own cock had also grown far too large for his underwear, almost instantly having to be taken off just in time for Brad to see the cock grow so much more larger as it snaked by, inch by inch.

All while the rest of his own clothing was completely gone shredded by his own well, shredded abs and giant muscular thighs that continued to grow, almost doubling in size to the point where they easily increased his waist size. “Fuck…Not feeling so good.”

“What’s the matter? Gonna quit?” laughed Brad as he looked down at his own phone. Fuck, he wasn’t feeling all that great either as he wanted to see Joe cum for him but a part of him also wanted to still at least be a bit smarter than him.

Fuck it.

He hastily increased Joe’s libido and began changing his face by adding a new profile picture for him. Joe’s own face started to shift from what was once the recognisable thin visage of “Josh” to now portraying the sexy Joe Manganiello with the nose growing larger, the brows thicker, the hair slightly shaggier and the jaw becoming ever more sharper.

“Not yet,” panted Joe as he groaned and looked down. Fuck, he could barely hold it in. He hastily typed away something about Brad, starting to see him as the perfect man to mould and make as he changed his hometown to Dallas, watching the name automatically change to “Travis” now instead of Bradley whilst his own face changed.

The head grew so much more bigger to accommodate the size of his new large body and thick neck with vocal chords that helped showcase some of that southern twang whilst his lips grew thinner and spread across his face. Travis’ hairline shifted back slightly as he grew older with age, only accentuating his facial features like a fine wine and a brown beard appearing over his chiselled chin.

Joe looked down at him.

“Wanna quit now?” asked Joe.

“Aw fuck dude, I think I-” Travis couldn’t even finish what he was saying as he heard Joe moan, not himself before suddenly watching the great muscular beast cum all over himself and his phone.

Travs was barely able to keep his phone out of range as just watching that dark cock almost explode in ecstasy was enough to cause him to give in and cum over his muscular body, looking down and panting in pure pleasure as he saw his seed stain his abs. “Aw god.” Travis reached for some nearby paper towels to clean himself off and handed Joe some spare clean ones.

“Oh man I think I fucked up my phone,” muttered Joe as he saw the “Swap Craft” screen flicker before turning off at once, drowning in darkness knowing it was never going resurface.

“Aw shit, can we not quit?” asked Travis. Joe shrugged.

“Doesn’t look like it, but you can still use your phone right?” questioned Joe. Travis looked down, confused. He could see some other options, one of which he think said ‘Revert’, but he could barely understand it.

“I don’t know what the other words say, but there’s a big green one that says share, if we wanna share our result?” Travis shrugged.

“Hell yeah, do that bro!” chuckled Joe and together they set their camera up, grabbing each other by the hand and tensing their biceps for the perfect picture.

Two lucky sexy fools sending their picture off into a sea of submissions of the Swap Craft Challenge, all showing similar sexy men of all kinds, some having more than two, all showing off their body, the result of the challenge. To this day, there is still no winner of the Swap Craft Challenge.

If you want to check out more stories like this, then click here to see more TF/hypno on my Patreon.

[vivmaek]

Synastry placements which indicate fated connection/ a connection or that person is meant to be in your life

Indications of a Fated Relationship

ʚɞ Sun Trine / Conjunct North Node ʚɞ This aspect creates an immediate connection and an instant sense of familiarity. Both parties might feel that this is destiny before the first date even begins. The Sun person will feel like the best version of themself around the North Node person. The Sun person also triggers growth in the North Node person. It is likely that a familial bond was shared in a past life.

ʚɞ Pluto Conjunct Mars ʚɞ The attraction present between both parties is intense. It's an aspect that forces confrontation upon your deepest desires and your greatest pains. Many intense experiences will be shared together. Both people can pick up on the hidden intentions and motives of one another. This may turn into an all-consuming relationship, one that leaves you without any energy left to give.

ʚɞ Sun Conjunct Saturn ʚɞ The Saturn person has karma to work through and must turn to the Sun person to find guidance. Any changes the Saturn person experiences are due to the influence of the Sun person. A sense of maturity is present from the start, both people feel as though they could settle down together. They can depend upon one another, but Saturn might feel threatened if the Sun person begins to grow without them.

ʚɞ Moon Conjunct Saturn ʚɞ The couple feels a deep responsibility towards one another which acts as the glue that holds their bond together. Oftentimes the Moon person must work through their co-dependency issues. The Saturn person is reliable even if they have to learn how to be more open towards the emotions of the Moon person.

ʚɞ Venus Conjunct Saturn ʚɞ Both parties might feel hesitant to enter into a partnership despite the powerful attraction that exists between them. The couple takes this relationship seriously and they exhibit caution for the sake of longevity. Guilt from their experiences in a past life might bubble up in this relationship. The Saturn person feels that the Venus person “owes” them something. The Venus person feels indebted to their partner and will probably be the first to make promises in the relationship.

ʚɞ Saturn Conjunct South Node ʚɞ This relationship requires a lot of work, and it will be impossible to avoid one another until this is dealt with. You may run into each other many times before a connection is formed. The South Node person will grow tremendously under the influence of the Saturn person.

ʚɞ Uranus Conjunct Venus ʚɞ This is a “love at first sight” aspect. You may meet one another in a sudden or unexpected manner, and unexpected events will continue to take place over the course of the relationship. Both parties feel fascinated by one another and an invigorating electric spark exists between the two. Neither one is afraid to showcase their weird personality traits or interests.

ʚɞ North Node / North Node ʚɞ This is an incredibly strong karmic tie. An immediate pull that goes beyond physical attraction was felt right away. It is as if their souls have been yearning for one another for many long years. The destinies of both individuals are in alignment, they were fated to be together. Both people will face and have faced similar spiritual lessons, this brings them closer together. The couple shares a similar vision for the future.

ʚɞ South Node / Personal Planets ʚɞ A deep sense of familiarity and constant deja vu occurs with these aspects. The relationship picks up where it left off in a past life.

ʚɞ North Node in 1st House ʚɞ The North Node person teaches the first house person how to be true to themselves and live authentically. The first house person's identity is strengthened through this relationship. It is likely that both people got along right away, they find it easy to be in one another's presence. Connecting on a deep level is an effortless process and respecting boundaries is never an issue. Nothing about this relationship feels forced. Both parties feel as though they were fated to meet one another.

ʚɞ North Node in 7th House ʚɞ A magnetic pull brought this couple together, they feel compelled to be together. The North Node person is especially attracted to the house person, they see their future with them. Their relationship came into existence to learn about partnership because this is something they have yet to master together. This can present challenges and it is easy to fall back on patterns exhibited through the South Node. Finding a balance between the needs of one another is key here.

ʚɞ North Node in 8th House ʚɞ This is an unforgettable relationship that awakens deep emotions. The North Node person will trigger extreme change within the house person's life. It may feel as though your souls have merged together. An incredibly intimate bond that looks at all your vulnerabilities through a magnifying glass. Dark and disturbing secrets, desires, or feelings will come forward so they can be worked through. Both partners understand each other on a level that compares to no one else.

✰ my masterlist

[reasonsforhope]

"India’s announcement that it aims to reach net zero emissions by 2070 and to meet fifty percent of its electricity requirements from renewable energy sources by 2030 is a hugely significant moment for the global fight against climate change. India is pioneering a new model of economic development that could avoid the carbon-intensive approaches that many countries have pursued in the past – and provide a blueprint for other developing economies.

The scale of transformation in India is stunning. Its economic growth has been among the highest in the world over the past two decades, lifting of millions of people out of poverty. Every year, India adds a city the size of London to its urban population, involving vast construction of new buildings, factories and transportation networks. Coal and oil have so far served as bedrocks of India’s industrial growth and modernisation, giving a rising number of Indian people access to modern energy services. This includes adding new electricity connections for 50 million citizens each year over the past decade. 

The rapid growth in fossil energy consumption has also meant India’s annual CO2 emissions have risen to become the third highest in the world. However, India’s CO2 emissions per person put it near the bottom of the world’s emitters, and they are lower still if you consider historical emissions per person. The same is true of energy consumption: the average household in India consumes a tenth as much electricity as the average household in the United States.  

India’s sheer size and its huge scope for growth means that its energy demand is set to grow by more than that of any other country in the coming decades. In a pathway to net zero emissions by 2070, we estimate that most of the growth in energy demand this decade would already have to be met with low-carbon energy sources. It therefore makes sense that Prime Minister Narendra Modi has announced more ambitious targets for 2030, including installing 500 gigawatts of renewable energy capacity, reducing the emissions intensity of its economy by 45%, and reducing a billion tonnes of CO2. 

These targets are formidable, but the good news is that the clean energy transition in India is already well underway. It has overachieved its commitment made at COP 21- Paris Summit [a.k.a. 2015, at the same conference that produced the Paris Agreement] by already meeting 40% of its power capacity from non-fossil fuels- almost nine years ahead of its commitment, and the share of solar and wind in India’s energy mix have grown phenomenally. Owing to technological developments, steady policy support, and a vibrant private sector, solar power plants are cheaper to build than coal ones. Renewable electricity is growing at a faster rate in India than any other major economy, with new capacity additions on track to double by 2026...

Subsidies for petrol and diesel were removed in the early 2010s, and subsidies for electric vehicles were introduced in 2019. India’s robust energy efficiency programme has been successful in reducing energy use and emissions from buildings, transport and major industries. Government efforts to provide millions of households with fuel gas for cooking and heating are enabling a steady transition away from the use of traditional biomass such as burning wood. India is also laying the groundwork to scale up important emerging technologies such as hydrogen, battery storage, and low-carbon steel, cement and fertilisers..."

-via IEA (International Energy Agency), January 10, 2022

Note: And since that's a little old, here's an update to show that progress is still going strong:

-via Economic Times: EnergyWorld, March 10, 2023

[pupmkincake2000]

So, after finishing Gale's origin, I think I'd play Astarion's. Don’t get me wrong, but it’s interesting for me to watch the romance with Gale from Astarion's POV, from the very beginning to the very end, because after reading some fics, I realized that I had never seen such a plot before. I mean falling in love with Gale right away, and not after all the events are over. That would be an amazing slowburn.

What do I mean, you ask? I noticed that when people write about this couple, it often comes up like this: Astarion is usually in a relationship with Tav, but when he/she/they reject him (remember the opportunity to remain friends with him, right?), Gail, according to the plot, usually invites Astarion to settle down in his tower and feelings arise later. Even if they flirted with each other before.

And although such stories are well written and interesting to read, I can’t help but feel that there’s a certain… wrongness in such a relationship? I mean, Astarion gets everything right away without doing much, home, a handsome lover who takes care of him and will do anything for him, yet Astarion himself does nothing to get anything of these after the game ends.

People usually justify this by saying that he has already suffered enough and deserves all the best. And I agree that yes, he really deserves it. However, I believe that in this case he achieved nothing on his own. He saved the world, yes, he killd his master, yes, but still... it happens when he has his friends around who would support him and a lover who he seduces for this particular purpose.

Of course, by this point he may already be in a full-fledged relationship, but it all started with a specific goal, right? And don’t think I hate him, I don’t, as I don't blame him for anything, anyone in his place would do everything to get at least some protection and hope for something better. I don’t know if I can explain what I mean in a best way, but I'll try.

Astarion simply moves in stories from under the protection of one lover to another. And usually in such cases, Gale insists that Astarion doesn’t owe him anything… and here I also agree, but in this case the question is: what did Astarion himself do to deserve all of this? Past suffering, it seems to me, is not a sufficient reason to give him everything at once and it doesn't mean he has to suffer more or anything. That is, as soon as Tav breaks up with him (or he with Tav), Astarion falls in love with the one who turned out to be as kind, more generous, who never demands anything in return. And there is, it seems to me, something not quite right in this.

What am I getting at? I would like to see Astarion's story, from a POV of a person who undergoes development, not just getting everything the best as a reward for his suffering. For example, I would like to watch the story from his point of view, when he falls in love with Gale, and for the sake of this love he begins to change, fight his traumas, outgrow them, because he realizes that, perhaps, for the first time in his life, he has fallen so deeply in love.

Without a relationship with Tav (I don’t like it at all when Tav is in the plot, they seem too unnecessary), but independently decided to change. And I want to say right away that by the word “change” I don’t mean anything bad, since he still changes when the player has a romance or friendship with him.

But for me, for example, it would be interesting to observe these changes, this growth, the struggle with traumas because of his love for Gale. Because there is someon who he cares about, not just about himself.

Let's be honest, Astarion is more a taker, Gale is a giver. Sometimes such relationships work but not always. Some people love to give, some people prefer to take. But I do not think it would work for them.

I see them as equals. Or at least are trying to be.

And yes, it can be love from the first sight (why not?), or the relationship can begin quite like in canon: with manipulation and seduction (tho I've never seen a fic in which Astarion falls in love right away), but then the realization comes that this is not just a hook-up that means nothing, but a connection that means, and not just to get someone as an ally who would help kill Cassador (after all, you can kill him simply by being friends with Astarion).

Although love at first sight from Astarion's perspective would be quite interesting, since Gale does not seem at all like a person who is easily manipulated and seduced.

There is something incredibly attractive about experiencing the whole story of this love from beginning to end (and despite the slowdown, they can still sleep with each other), and only then, when the final battle is over, they can go to Gale’s home together , but not because Astarion has nowhere to go and he again risks being left alone, but because by that time he and Gale will already be in love and confess their feelings to each other (I think it will be even more interesting to watch from Astarion's POV), and therefore they will no longer imagine their life without each other.

It will all look even tastier if it all happens long before the final battle, because Astarion will already have something to lose.

I want Astarion to try as hard on the relationship as Gale usually tries in fanfiction to heal his injuries. But I have almost never come across stories where they both worked on the relationship and healed each other equally. In most stories, unfortunately, Astarion gets much more, with almost no effort (we are not to talk about his past suffering), and this is just frustrating, as if he is not able to build his happiness on his own.

Someone may mention his traumas again and I understand perfectly well that not everyone can overcome their nightmares alone. But that’s why I mentioned that I would like to see how both work on relationships. In the game, Astarion is the one who takes, and Gale is more the one who gives (which I've already mentioned), but I would like to see equality, so that both give and take equally. And from Astarion's perspective, this would be incredibly interesting to watch, mainly precisely because he is the one who takes, he isn't used to give, but for his beloved, at least when he realizes he's in love, he would want to do more. To be more than just a taker.

You don't have to agree with me. But this is how I would like their relationship to be.

Oh, one more thing

I see Astarion as someone who tops, I do not mind switching, but top Astarion and bottom Gale sounds nice♡( ◡‿◡ )

[sokkastyles]

"Zuko and Azula are both tragic"

But they aren't, though. That's the point.

Azula's story is a tragedy. Zuko's story is a triumphant story of growth and redemption.

And that's not only okay, but necessary to acknowledge if you want to talk about this story in terms of abuse and personal responsibility and morality and mental health.

I mean, on one level it's tragic for Zuko that his sister continues the cycle of abuse and violence they grew up with, but that's still the tragedy of Azula's story.

I'm sorry, but it's super fucking weird when fans pretend that these two characters do not exist specifically to be contrasted with each other in the narrative and act like they're real people who deserve equal treatment.

And those are the fans who I think are well-meaning, without even getting into the whole issue of certain fans demanding redemption like it's something owed to a character. Way to miss the point on that one.

[femmefatalevibe]

Do you have tips on how to be emotionally mature?

Remember that everyone is ultimately out for themselves. They don't think about you and your choices as much as you think they do. Make taking care of yourself and advocating for yourself your #1 priority. While you should be respectful and show empathy for others' circumstances, your life is meant to be lived for you.

Don't take people's comments or actions personally. Almost none of their responses are a reflection of you or your character. Most people's actions are a reflection of how they see themselves. When people reveal their true colors, believe them. Proceed with this information in mind – whether it's a friendship, professional opportunity, romantic endeavor, familial tie, etc.

Set boundaries and non-negotiables for yourself. Don't overextend yourself to seek approval or validation as a means of dictating your self-worth or value to others. Learn to trust your gut instincts, and remain mindful of your energetic limitations. "No" is a complete sentence. It is not selfish to stick to your non-negotiable habits (bedtime, workout schedule, etc.) – these practices are a sign of self-respect and self-love. Speak your mind (with tact) and stand your ground. You owe it to yourself to live the life that you want.

Know that the only constant in life is change. People and opportunities will come and go with age. Enjoy the moments and experiences you get to enjoy with others or alone. Relationships are meant to last for a season, a reason, or a lifetime. Not every impactful connection is meant to last a lifetime, but you shouldn't invalidate the lasting impact of certain temporary connections – they most definitely can change your life.

Remain selective about those you allow into your life and the company you keep. Embrace the quality over quantity approach when it comes to choosing the individuals who deserve to be in your inner circle. Don't disclose information you wouldn't want in writing to those who have yet to earn your trust. Cut ties unapologetically with people who choose to tear you down or disrespect you. You win in life when everyone you're close to is supportive and committed to cheering each other on in all of their life goals/milestones.

Learn to accept and explore discomfort. Growth requires change, and a side effect of change is discomfort. Accept that the circumstances are presenting you with an opportunity in life to level up. Breathe and take things one step at a time. Sometimes, you don't need to know the big-picture meaning of the conversation or task in front of you. Focus on what's in front of you – using good judgment and critical thinking skills – and figure the rest out later.

Set your future self up to win. Eat a healthy diet, move your body, save and invest, read books, build your professional and social networks, and upskill professionally and interpersonally, go to the doctors annually (all the major ones – primary care, dentist, gyno, dermatologist) or whenever an issue presents itself to nip it in the bud early.

Remain curious. Don't act on baseless assumptions. Ask someone about the intention or emotions behind their actions before creating a conflict or making accusations. Accept wishful thinking for what it is – especially when it comes to romance and professional endeavors. A job offer doesn't exist until it's signed and sealed in writing. Relationships come with exclusivity, clear and regular communication, and no issues with public knowledge or a title.

Reframe mistakes and failures as life lessons. These opportunities inspire self-reflection, performance evaluation, and introspection. Use these experiences to help you map out your next moves and strategize your actions toward success.

Creating life milestone timelines is useless. We all have our own history, circumstances, goals, and personalities. Individuals born in each given year are not a hivemind. Don't compare your journey to others. We are all on our own paths with different significant milestones at different points in our lives.

Embrace your desires. Indulge your adult self and inner child. Explore the pleasure of getting to know yourself – your likes, dislikes, values, preferences, and turn-ons/turnoffs in every area of life. Allow yourself the time, space, energy, and resources you need to satisfy your authentic self. Don't compromise your identity for the approval or praise of others. Learn what you want and be unapologetic for satisfying your own needs. Discover, experiment, play, test, learn, and re-evaluate as needed. Gamifying your life helps free you of societal expectations of what it means to be a certain age, gender, or personality based on your nationality, profession, sexuality, socioeconomic status, etc.

[seventeenlovesthree]

Since it's my personal mission to make everybody watch the Digimon Adventure Tri Stage Play, I dug up one of my favourite interviews again. I owe the producer my life, because he simply managed to create the best piece of Digimon Adventure media since Adventure itself (in my opinion almost as amazing as Our War Game and that MEANS something). However, I saw a few people being confused about a few things, so I wanted to clarify:

"Wait, is the Stage Play just Tri's story but done on stage?"

Nope, it does take place during the Tri era (between the third and fourth movie to be exact), but it is an original (side) story that can be watched without having any knowledge of Tri or Tri's plot.

"Does the story take place in the real or in the Digital World?"

That would actually be a spoiler and since there is no easy answer to this, I'm gonna say you have to watch it for yourself.

"Are the characters like in the original or like in Tri?"

That's the fun part - of course there are glimpses and pieces of the Tri characterizations, but the producer really did his very best to adapt the characters faithfully and as respectfully from the original source material as much as he could and I think you can feel that:

"To be honest, the generational timing was a little off for me, so I had never seen Digimon before. After I received the request for the stage play, I watched all of it, including the original TV series and the movie series, but I didn’t expect that I’d be crying so many times. It was a story of human growth and Digimon evolution being deeply intertwined, and I watched as that growth and evolution was overlaid with so many other things. Maybe it was because I watched it as an adult, but I was able to see it from all sorts of perspectives in regards to “people growing”. (...) While I’ve worked with other people’s stories and made plays out of them several times, it was usually in the sense of taking the original work’s story and repurposing it for the stage format. But for this one, even though I’m borrowing the original series’s characters, the story is being written from scratch, and it’s my first time writing words for characters that were created by other people. It was a high level of difficulty, and I still feel it even now. Also, it made me wonder how the scriptwriters for the anime must have done this. They were also writing the same characters in the same world, while sharing that job with tons of other people. It’s amazing that they were able to do that. But, naturally, it wasn’t just full of difficult and painful things, but once the story properly got going, I got to hear the lines I was writing in the voices of the characters from the original series, and getting to savor those kinds of moments was very fun. Someone like me, who works in the theatre field, gets to take over the job of writing the lines of characters made by others. And then I have Toei check over it, and we get even closer to the mark. So in other words, we bring these characters to life by sharing them between everyone. And especially in the case of Digimon, it was an interesting experience in that there wasn’t just one writer or director, but rather that everyone had their own version of Taichi and Yamato, and the dialogue was born from between all of that.

"Anything else I need to know?"

If you are able to see past some cringe, don't mind nostalgia baiting and are okay with a few... Questionable scenes in regards to the main antagonist (which you will definitely know if you've watched the original Adventure series), you will enjoy this.

Also, personally, I'd say this is the order of plot relevance of each human character, so if your favourite characters are in the top half of the list (and even if they're not), you are likely to have fun:

Taichi

Jyou

Koushirou

Yamato

Mimi

Hikari

Sora

Takeru

[kandadze]

Ep 28 loose thoughts

I'm glad for the lighthearted opening, because I know it'll just go downhill from here. Also, PSJ lumped with the men while ZYZ gets to annoy them from the distance is peak comedy. Again, I'm pretty sure we'll need all the laughs we can get.

Also, this is purely from an aesthetic point of view, and seeing ZYC out of his usual deep blues, grays and indigos was jarring, to say the least. The sandy beige does not compliment his porcelain complexion at all... unless they were going for this washed-out, weary look specifically, in which case, A+ (and boy, does he have reasons to be weary lol). Bonus: Ying Lei and PSJ knowing exactly why he's calling ZYZ a bastard 😂

"Next time, please finish your words in one go." Where's the fun in that though, ZYZ? You walked right into that one all by yourself 🤣

Of course Li Lun's way of "asking" for the scale was to threaten its owner with death. I'm afraid he hasn't learned anything... pity, really. I would love for him to have *some* sort of character growth.

Wow, ain't she miss popular all of a sudden! Is the Chongwu Camp guy gonna help LL to save Bai Jiu's body, or is he gonna go with his boss's orders after all? And of course the boss has *something* on the princess - I refuse to believe that his repulsive ass is Meng Xuan.

What's with that look, LL? Did you forget that the 3-face-mask - what's his name again? Wen something? - is after ZYZ's inner core? Did you think he was gonna stop trying to get it when you backed out of your deal? (Unless he's more like, welp, there goes my chance to get rid of the  poison...)

The whole "why do we need the scale" sequence is sending me. Ying Lei: she's so good at making up stories! ZYC: she probably got that from one of her novels. YL: I was not allowed to read erotica!!! 🤣 Meanwhile, in the distance, WX: let me spin this even harder, for maximum effect. ZYZ: 😲😱🤯😵‍💫🫡 YL: 🤢

But of course, the show will not let us forget that the success rate of interspecies romance in this universe is exactly zilch, nada, and zippo... and here I am, still holding onto hope for some kind of satisfactory ending. Oof, the way WX went "you owe me a life" so matter-of-factly... give me more female characters with a backbone of steel!

Omg can I just barf. Wen Zongyu *is* Meng Xuan? Is it just me who finds the taste of the Wilderness women we've seen so far shacking up with humans - Bai Jiu's mom and now the princess -  highly questionable? Like, why. My aroace ass cannot conceive how the princess could fall for *that* guy, of all people. I've sat through all the tragic romances so far not quite understanding maybe, but believing in all of them, but this, no.

(Also, it is now confirmed, that little bridge is like a tourist attraction for lovers, only every couple who sat on it is doomed. You should've played with your sparklers at the dock, ZYZ, WX!)

Oh wait hold up? Meng Xuan is someone WZY knew? He pretended to be him? Oh for fuck's sake! But the woman the princess poisoned *was* WZY's wife, right? And WX's dad and WZY knew each other??? This is so confusing ffs

"An innocent person's only crime is to own something valuable." "People with a treasure are always surrounded by bad wolves and cunning foxes. In most cases, in order to protect the treasure, they become a bloodthirsty beast, too." "It's a choice. She could choose not to." Love this whole convo on innocence and how it can get twisted, and ZYC restating his values. (I also get distracted by his eyelashes, like, constantly. 😅)

Oh, is WX going for the jugular. (And it appears only ZYC knew about the princess killing WX's dad. When did he find out, I wonder.) Also, hello? The *triple* murderer gets to make a request? For ZYZ's inner core, nonetheless??? I mean, I know why she's asking for that specifically - Chongwu Camp lackey did get to her first, after all - but that's not how "paying back" works, lady.

ZYZ, you just promised ZYC that you won't seek death, and then not only do you risk your life for him almost immediately after, now you're back on your self-sacrificial bs??? I swear, ZYC's patience for this demon. And his love, too. "Keep your inner core. I won't exchange it for anything, not even the Cloud Light Sword." Ahhh my heart.

Did he really pull a demonic equivalent of "my body, my choice"??? ::dies:: and then he goes, you don't want to make that choice, I'll make it for you. I immediately flashed back to Ying Long making the decision for Bingyi, oh no 😭

Awwww goddamnit everyone (not you WX, you're on the right side here), stop making ZYC sad! He cares for all of you, stop forcing him to make impossible choices! (You can tell I'm really invested when I start talking directly to the characters lol) In a way I understand why Ying Lei and PSJ would choose Xiao Jiu over ZYZ. YL's grandpa's death is no doubt still fresh on his mind, and even though in a way he seems to be going against his grandpa's final act of love, it's also a sort of "life for life" reasoning. For PSJ, even if her views of demons shifted since we first met her, Xiao Jiu is first and foremost a kid who reminds her of her brother. So I understand where they might be coming from, and I still don't like that ZYC has to deal with his found family fracturing before his very eyes.

Goddamnit, Ying Lei's projecting his own wish for being special and chosen. Makes sense, our underappreciated comic relief might not be expressing it much but we've been shown his constant vying for attention and validation (especially from ZYC and XJ) often enough. Headpats my dear boy, you *are* special. You are also, however, using emotional blackmail to sway ZYC, and I don't like that.

Ah, PSJ, back to annoying tf out of me. "Not 'we.' Just you and Zhuo Yichen" is it now? Damn it, this show just keeps finding ways to make my heart hurt. Don't break up the family!!! Not like this! You tell them, ZYC! (ZYZ's face when ZYC in essence said, over my dead body!)

............

Remember folks this is me yelling into my notepad as I'm watching bit by bit. At this point I had to stop because I reached my limit and at the same time had a terrible thought that this is another illusion. Because no way in hell did I just watch them-  Draw. Weapons. On. ZYC???!!!

This can't be real. ZYZ, stop this nonsense!

....... I hate it here.

Okay, before I go any further, I *know* from the MV and the trailer that whatever the fuck just happened can't be real. But they better have a *very* good explanation because my poor heart pretty much stopped for a moment.

So they got the scale. Yippie.

What was the point of all of this if she dgaf for the letter? Please get them both off of my screen, he's a fucking monster and she has no taste, and I dgaf for their tragic story (barf). I think this is the first time I got seriously annoyed while watching this drama, which, considering we're on ep 28, is a feat in itself.

How tf did he recognize PSJ's arrow? Can he tell it's hers by its trajectory? I guess he's just naturally brilliant at everything killing related?

OMG ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, DRAMA. We were told earlier that the fish can communicate with Longyu! And they gave us a shot of fish in that pond they were all standing at! They even showed us WX holding up something before the "break-up" started - I just didn't realize it was her "notebook"... So everyone was acting??? But there was no way ZYC could've read her notes, so was he the only one who wasn't??? 😭 You mofos, how dare you put him through stress like that!!!

"Go away." "Okay." Someone's sleeping on a couch tonight... From the music in the background I know we're supposed to find this reveal funny, the *four* of them definitely do (while laughing at him), and I just keep thinking of what it must've felt like to him. Isn't his biggest fear losing his loved ones? Whether by death or by a difference in thought, which changes love into hate? (Stil not over that little speech on love vs hate XJ's mom gave several eps back!) Even if it was a ruse, for him it was real. In short, ZYC my man, I applaud you for your restraint; I would've blasted the lot with some ice by now.

Oof another reveal. Will the asshole care? I doubt it. ZYZ's hand on WX's shoulder because of course she's gonna blame herself. Aaaand I was right, the asshole doesn't care... can someone just shoot him for me, please.

Wow, ZYZ, you little attention whore. And again they're giving us the "you can't choose your origin, but you can choose your own life," just as they're marching us towards the inevitable end. Nooo, not the leaves speech! Seriously, the amount of beautiful, soul-crushing lines in this drama! Aaaand he just said the title. The dream will end, we will wake up, we'll go back to reality. But we'll remember the dream forever... I feel like WX is expressing our hopes for a different ending, and ZYZ is confirming our fears that it can't be changed. Goddamnit.

And then she goes, let's live together, even though there's definitely something wrong going on with her??? Thanks for the forehead touch, drama, I'm a sucker for those.

Aw LL, you sad little demon possessing a dying child's body. I find it fascinating how different his cave looks now, almost ethereal with all the flowers and floating lights, while he's decaying (not to mention all the raw meat he's been consuming).

ZYC changed clothes, thank goodness 😅 I mean, y'all *could* just apologize? Why make it seem that he's the unreasonable one for being genuinely upset over something he didn't know was an act? The prolonged hovering of their hands, I can't 🤣 Do you want to get the scale stolen? Because that's how you get things stolen in this world, by not using them immediately. Come to think of it, why don't they know how to use it? You'd think Ying Long told them, right? (What you wanna bet that somehow WZY knows?) What the heck did I just say? They're already being watched...

Good on you for not being fooled (I mean, ZYC *never* smiles like that, why does she keep making the same mistake), but oh goodness did he lose the thing he was supposed to guard with his life *fast*. I hate that we see them so reactive so often, and just *not* smart. They *just* said LL was going to try to get the scale - but they still left Ying Lei by himself? Please, you're supposed to be good, not *dumb*!

Huh, I guess I should've known there'll be another twist(s). I'm exhausted so all I have left is, I appreciate the little moment of softness between LL and his human livers dealer, and did ZYZ really teach LL *all* his tricks? We shall see. (And as I promised myself, I'm not checking out the preview. My sanity's frayed as it is.)

[shadowscommand]

Please, talk more about Nikto and his brother and their upbringing. whatever crosses your mind/you wanna talk about GO (please and thank you and I love your hcs)

wwww 🥺🥺 ok so with his brother i always think of him feeling like nikto Owes him bc he had in part "raised" nikto while their mom was busy AND nikto seemed to be the clear favorite (untrue) bc he had the "active" father as per my last ask and a perceived lack of responsibilities. nikto has never felt this way bc their mom just like wasnt a very good mother.. she was too young at the start, disadvantaged, and put a lot of blame on both of them so nikto had never felt any sort of "win" over his brother he sees them as like. equals. as teens when they both got way more freedom (ie getting into partying, cars) is probably when they were closest bc a lot of the flack from their mom would be applied to the Both of them (for being out too late partying, for stealing and crashing her cars, for getting her in trouble with shops bc theyre known as Her Kids who keep shoplifting) but as they get older and go different ways (nikto staying stagnant, his brother EXTREMELY SLOWWLYY (not in the military bc hes smart) investing more in personal growth) the closeness is sort of lost. but so is a lot of the bitterness between each other. so like as teens they were together all the time but also prone to explosive arguments due to repressed baggage but as adults theyre way, way calmer with each other. um.. and then nikto gets held and tortured and his identity is wiped and he Becomes Nikto and suddenly hes too ashamed to see his brother.

[mermaidlighthouse]

Why I think Izzy’s death was actually necessary despite me being sad about losing my favorite* character…

So I am once again looking to reframe a moment/scene involving Izzy around Ed because as much as Izzy was his own character (with a wonderful redemption arc) his function in the narrative imo is as an extension of the Blackbeard persona and therefore Ed and his perception of himself

Ok so this is gonna be long but I think it’s necessary to frame this properly

Izzy and Ed’s relationship is one of misery loving company and instead of finding ways to legitimately pull each other up and heal from whatever brought you to that place it turns to one of toxicity where you either repress the trauma (Ed never telling anyone that he killed his father, that he feels like a monster) or express it in ways that only perpetuate the misery. At this point that constant cycle of misery is so familiar it can be difficult for the participants to recognize what they’re doing to themselves and each other and it’s difficult to not fall back into those patterns.

So while Izzy is making strides and having his arc, instead of saying to Ed maybe don’t go looking for darkness when you’re standing in the light, don’t look for trouble or problems that don’t exist just because that’s what you’ve come to expect he says maybe you’re just a mopey twat and there isn’t a fuckin storm, when Ed does apologize for his leg Izzy’s only response is fuck off.

They can’t communicate with each other effectively and it’s already caused issues. When Izzy tells Ed to listen to the feeling of throwing away the trappings of Blackbeard, Ed does but he has also been told by Izzy that Ed isn’t good enough so why would Stede want him now that he’s not gonna be Blackbeard. I think Izzy meant well and had the right sentiment but the fact is that the damage of what they do to each other has already been done. Izzy doesn’t just represent the devil on Ed’s shoulder, he’s the voice in his head telling him he’s worthless without Blackbeard.

So could the narrative have just said Izzy went off on his own or went with the crew in the end? imho no they couldn’t because in order to have a healthy relationship with Stede, and just to be a generally well adjusted person Ed needs to love himself and the constant knowledge that his self loathing can just pop up out of nowhere (something explicitly shown as an Izzy staple) won’t allow him that freedom. (I recognize this isn’t how self development/self esteem works irl but this is a dark comedy rom com just let some things be hand wavy.)

Sometimes the best way to help each other grow and be whole is to recognize that you need to let the other person go. That’s true for BOTH of them.

Izzy dying was the only way they could finally communicate honestly without the jibes and the looming Blackbeard of it all they could just talk to each other as family as people who love each other (this is not my ship and I have a serious issue with the lack of nuanced takes on love in this fandom but that’s a separate issue).

To give Izzy some grace here I would like to point out that his story can also be seen as one that tells the audience that toxic people in your life or people you have complicated relationships with are allowed to grow on their own and make positive changes for themselves BUT that does not mean you have to accept them back in your life, you are not required to give them space after they’ve wronged you. You can celebrate their growth but you don’t owe them anything. Ed can recognize that Izzy has changed but he was never going to fully excise Izzy from his life he’s too familiar and too much a darkness to hide in and it would have created more toxic situations. So yes Izzy had to die.

*I always mean favorite side character because my favorite character is EdStede/StedeEd. If you don’t love them, together and separately then you don’t love the show because this is their story

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

august 17, 2021 3:00 p.m. yonsei university

[grant] did your dad apologize for being a dick, though?

[henry] of course. he was a good person and realized he was being a bit weird. he just hated noise. i think he'd have been happy to be born with a set of noise-canceling headphones attached to him.

[grant] except maybe he liked your mom’s noise from that day forward!

[henry] he did, but even if he hated it, he was probably glad to have hers back after a while. almost half the time they dated, they didn’t even live in the same country.

[henry] my mom worked at an art shop somewhere in seoul, and my dad had this sweet gig working at a museum in paris while getting a doctorate and doing some traveling, visiting art museums on every continent. he got the doctorate, but gave up the job to come back and marry my mom.

[henry] and she won out, to be honest. him teaching here was a prestigious position, and his family are pretty well off because they're in banking and all, so she got to quit her job after marriage, have me, and just sculpt for fun.

[grant] that’s the dream, right?

[henry] i think so.

[grant] it’s nice to be genuinely in love but also to support each other’s passions, too, whether that's helping them pursue a job or a hobby. i mean, that’s everything. that's the deepest form of connection. oh yeah, definitely the dream.

[henry] for sure. there wasn’t much for my mom to help with because she was never wealthy and her parents weren’t either, but she was a huge moral support. she was my dad’s biggest fan. sometimes getting a doctorate sucked, and he wanted to quit, but it was hard to quit with her on the sidelines cheering.

[henry] that’s like me and soobin. not much i can do on the money front because i'm not rich and i won't take money from my parents, and i couldn’t help with her medical school because i'm a certifiably terrible student, but i can be and am her cheerleader.

[henry] and i may not have been a photographer without her. being an artist is the worst career choice unless someone else has money to throw at the bills. and i make an okay salary! i have solid clientele booking all year long, but i don't charge what i "should" because i feel wrong asking too much money to do wedding photos and all. that shit's expensive - i'll take a small cut off the going rate so they get all they want for the big day.

[henry] besides, the one thing in life that makes me nervous is clients being unhappy. everything else about a wedding goes away except the photos. if they're unhappy, i'd rather the pricing not be an extra issue, you know? at least let it be a cheap mistake.

[grant] but you would have still pursued this, right? i can’t imagine you not at least trying it out. you have always been set on some kind of photography as a career. even when you were having a crisis around college graduation about whether you should pursue high-brow art or something very human and realistic like you do now, you never questioned if photography was your truth.

[henry] i would have. i've always known it was my goal. i just think the financial stress may have worn me down eventually if she wasn’t willing to shoulder an extra share of the burden. like i said, charging people themselves is a strange thing, and you just never know what can happen. sure, i did end up with a good brand through putting myself out there on social media, but that was no guarantee.

[henry] if that hadn't worked out, i'd have been in trouble. and when you don't have a lot of clients or reach, you have to be conservative and sometimes that hurts you on growth. blah blah blah. point is, i owe soobin a lot, both for financial support and her total faith in me.

[grant] well, teamwork makes the dream work and all that!

[henry] hey, you're part of the team, too. there's no one else i'd rather call at 3AM asking to check the red balance on my pictures because everything looks green to me. and as it turns out, having a friend with a massive family who host many events requiring photography is excellent for clientele building.

[iicedmatchalatte]

Hi, How do you think Mars in the 12th house in Synastry would play out

Hi!!

The mars person feels as if the house person owes them something, (apply to your situation—familial, romantic, coworker etc.) The mars person wants to aggressively dig into the house person’s subconscious, knowing their deepest fears and really what makes them tick. I feel like this can be a very aggravating aspect to have with someone, you can share this with a person who gets under your skin like no other. These two are very spiritually/sexually drawn to each other, so much so that there can be repulsion. Fights are common here, mars the planet of aggression and drive falling into the 12th house— secrets, dreams, shadow self can be very uncomfortable and explosive. The positive side of this is that these two can trigger a spiritual growth in one another, helping each other work through trauma they never knew they had.

[solei-eclipse]

Sending this as an ask cause I don't think tumblr is going to let me send this full thing in the reply of your last post:

Your wellbeing is more important than anything else! It's okay if you miss stuff or are too tired to participate when things happen within the community; it's okay if you're not as fixated on Alien Stage anymore; just because you are admittedly seen as one of the bigger ALNST bloggers on Tumblr does NOT mean that you owe anyone anything. That goes for the OC stuff too. Sorry if this is a bit too personal, but we enjoy seeing you around not because of what you can provide but because you’re you, and we just enjoy your presence; it's as simple as that. We love you Para, and we just want you to be okay.

It's not too personal at all, no worries :) in fact, it was really nice to read when I first saw it. thank you for all your reassurances, you have no idea the wonders it did for me.

thank you for your kindness, im genuinely really grateful for all this understanding. there's a lot of stuff that I've been forced to deal with lately and while the current issue is thankfully over, I know another one is bound to pop up soon. It's okay, though! I'll manage, it'll just take some time. I hope you guys can forgive me for going silent on occasion... I'm still here! Just busy.

Honestly I've been a little more comfortable on this sideblog than on shkingpardigm... that blog has a great deal of followers and while I will always be grateful for it, admittedly I've been more cautious. I always worry about saying the wrong thing, haha... (I find I still do very often though) The rapid growth of that blog was both fascinating and startling. Now that it's become bigger, I've been worried about whether or not my passion for ALNST is enough. I'm not sure when I'll be able to get to all the requests and thoughts shared with me over there, but I really hope to answer eventually because I want to honor the time and effort others spent into writing them. It's just been so much lately, and I can barely find the right words anymore. I almost always feel guilty for posting when I haven't answered them yet, especially since I love reading them and am really grateful to receive them.

It's been a little easier on here, where I've been creating my own things and sharing these creations with others, building our things around each other and such. Thank you all for being so wonderful and kind.

I hope this doesn't come off as me being ungrateful. I've been worried about voicing these thoughts for a while because I know how disheartening it may sound. I love ALNST, I love every ask and submission I receive no matter if it's a few short words or entire lengthy essays, and I love sharing thoughts and creations with others. There's just so much I want to do and so little time, so little energy I have left especially with my degrading health. All I can do at this point is ask for patience and forgiveness. Me bones don't work like they used to, youngsters.... arghhh my back.... my scoliosis..... my debts..

Once again, still here! Always will be (menacingly), just don't be too worried if I disappear sometimes!! That's me going out there and fighting the Horrors™. I always feel such a sense of joy and relief when I come back to Tumblr and see everyone's posts and creations (ALNST or OC or anything, really). It's like a reprieve for me, seeing all the new things that have been posted.

Thanks again for all your concern and support, I want you guys to know that I return it tenfold and hope you take care of yourselves as well. All the same applies to you! Take a step back whenever necessary, always prioritize yourself and know that you aren't pressured or expected of anything. You will still be loved and cared for no matter what! Always take your time and do what makes you happy :) <3